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I decided to write this for all of those people who ask me the exact same questions in one form or another. Now I can just tell them to go to my web site rather than repeating myself continually. Don't worry, though, I appreciate the curiosity!
Are you coming back? (This is asked by people at my former school who have seen me popping in and out for various reasons like going on field trips or returning text books)
No. No, I am absolutely not going back.
Oh, so do you take correspondence courses?
No, I don't. This doesn't mean I never will but considering that I've been out of school about two months and I left part way through the year I didn't really consider this to be important.
Your mom is a teacher, right? Oh, so does she teach you?
Yes, my mom is a teacher. I don't know exactly what you mean by the statement "does she teach you?" If you mean does she sit at the kitchen table with me and a math book and go over algebra, then no, she doesn't -at least not often.
I don't think there's anything wrong with that but it isn't a method I find useful for myself. If you're going to do that you might as well be at school.
If, on the other hand, you mean do I learn things from her, then yes, of course I do. I learn things from her just as I do from my dad and my friends and anyone else around me but no one is responsible for lecturing me or giving me notes. I learn whatever I want to learn and if my mom or dad can help me then I ask them, if not I look in libraries, ask other people or use the Internet. I don't have a "teacher" anymore because I am my own teacher. What more efficient way is there? Don't I know myself best and what knowledge I need?
"So do you still have friends your own age?" Or "What about socialization?" Or "Do you still see people from school?"
These questions make me laugh because they are so predictable. People always ask me this in one form or another. It seems that they're more concerned about my social life after leaving school than my actual education.
To answer, yes, I do have friends my own age. Yes, I do see people from school. As far as "What about socialization" I say what about it?
Having been in school my whole life I do have friends from school and inevitably friends who are my own age. Some of these friends have drifted from me or I've ended our friendships but they were sliding in that direction for years. Some friends find me a little too radical to hang around with now. After all, what does one say to a vegetarian, yoga practicing, humanitarian girl who recently left school? That's okay; I don't mind it. I have quite a few friends from school but these are not my only friends. I also have quite a few friends who are adults. Many of them happen to be former teachers. Some are writers, some are professors, some are family but I do have friends.
I tend to prefer adults because they usually have a more mature disposition -something kids my age often lack.
I find that ever since I left school my social life is more wonderful than it ever has been. The quality of my interactions has increased. I'm involved in all sorts of activities like volunteering at a local special needs playgroup and at my junior high school and attending book launches and birthday parties and all sorts of things! I do tend to prefer one on one contact rather than large groups of people but this has nothing to do with leaving school or being reclusive!
Contrary to popular belief I am not locked away in my room all the time!
Don't you have to write exams?
No, I don't have to follow any curriculum or take any tests, actually. I could write exams but I really wonder why I would ever choose to do such a thing of my own accord.
How will you ever get into university without transcripts? How will you be accepted?
O.k. The answer is yes; you definitely CAN go to university if you don't have transcripts. Many people have done this. Over 800 post-secondary education centers accept Homeschoolers. I have emailed a few places I'm interested in personally and the replies were quite encouraging. This doesn't mean it won't be more difficult. I'm sure it is but it doesn't matter to me. A lot of places are still quite old fashioned and won't even bother with you unless you have a whole lot of numbers to represent yourself. There are a few options in this case. You could write the SAT's or any other equivalency test. You could get your parents to make a transcript for you (if you actually get marks). You could not bother with any of it and have a portfolio of your work and depend on this and an individual interview. I would say that a lot of letters of recommendation would be helpful!
Personally, I am not at all sure if I want to go to university. I'm sure I could do so at this very moment if I wished, but I don't. I do not plan on taking the SAT's or any other test. This is just a personal choice because I find it silly to fight so hard to get out of the system and then, in two years write a test to prove I'm good enough for the system and I meet their standards. I also know that a few Colleges and Universities are actually seeking out "Homeschoolers/Unschoolers/ whatever you want to call yourself". They believe these students will be more resourceful, more enthusiastic about learning, and very independent.
What do you do?
I don't know how I'm supposed to answer this question without listing every single activity I've done for the past few months.
I do whatever I want to do. That is, as far as learning. I still have chores and I still have responsibilities. If anything, this has made me even more responsible.
If I feel like daydreaming all day, I do so. If I feel like taking off on my bike and riding all day long, I do. If I am engrossed in a novel and don't want to move for two days I won't. If I decide I want to have a web page, I find a friend who knows what they're doing and I make one. If I want to make play-dough and construct the insides of a frog, I do. If I want to do math all week long, I will. If I want to do yoga or work out on our weight machine, I do. If I want to sleep in until noon and stay up after midnight, I will. If I find astronomy really interesting, I'll do everything I can to learn about it.
Lately my interests have been very focused on Psychology (which fascinates me), India, journal-writing, biking, algebra, reading (about thirty different books at the moment), ancient history, writing emails to my friends in Ontario, story-writing, a bit of French, volunteer work, biology and conversations. I love to talk. I never learn better than when I write or talk things out. Thank goodness I have a few people in my life that are good at listening.
Sometimes I feel that to really learn a particular thing I need to take notes on it, so I will. Or just reading might be the best way. Sometimes I just ask a lot of questions, find someone who knows about it and observe them, and become their friend. Sometimes I read and re-read things. Usually I learn by living. If we're all out of envelopes and I have a letter to mail I will start folding a piece of paper until I get an envelope. Since I've found it impossible to STOP learning I don't worry about it too much anymore. I just live.
I love gardening. Right now I'm working on an herb and flower garden. I would never have had time for this while in school.
I am a member of Amnesty International and lots of hours are spent writing appeals to governments on behalf of prisoners of conscience. I also write comforting cards to the prisoners themselves and their families.
I think that one of the most valuable things to learn is how to take care of yourself, how to keep yourself in balance and how to live in this world. If schools really taught this then why do so many mothers worry when their children go off to College? Why, if you observe the groceries of most university students do you see so much Kraft Dinner and other pre-made stuff, well, probably because it's cheap but also because many don't know how to feed themselves in a healthy way.
So, I do what I want to do, I follow my passions, and I'm not worried. If I know how to live then I'll be able to adapt to whatever comes along, even if my academic knowledge might not match. In life, math and science and geography aren't put in neat little quadrants of totally unrelated material.
Academic knowledge is actually quite important to me but I don't discriminate against any particular learning material. I learn it joyfully and that's that. I do what I want.
Is it legal?
Yes. The laws vary from place to place, but yes.
For some of the Canadian laws try this website.
Do you have summer break?
I don't know how to begin with this one. There are so many different ways to respond to such a question. It really depends on what you mean.
If you mean do I stop learning during summer then the answer is of course not. Since this will be my first summer as a non-schooler I don't know how studious I'll be but how can you stop learning?
When I was in school I devoured whatever information I could get my hands on during summer break. I don't intend to stop now that I'm out of school. Learning is a life-long thing. Since I have not yet found the switch to turn my brain off for two months, the only option is learning. This doesn't mean I'll be hunched over textbooks all day, ignoring the lovely weather. Summer is no different than winter or fall to me except that the temperatures are different. I'll probably just keep on doing whatever I love. This is a wonderful investment. If you always follow your heart you can easily avoid having breakdowns and doubts and bouts of depression. I have the flexibility to choose the best times for me to work and to harmonize myself with the rhythms of nature.
Because I can now avoid a lot of the stress factors of school I am freer to enjoy this "break." I don't have to lounge around and recuperate because there is nothing to recuperate from. My energy is always available to me because it isn't being depleted by tasks that are meaningless to me. My whole life will be a continuous learning process; I will see the wisdom in every moment, so why would summer be any different?
Don't your parents ever make you do things? Aren't there things you should learn?
My parents respect me with the equality of any other person and not just "their child" to manipulate or coerce. But as far as certain things I HAVE to learn, I don't think that works. I've tried it. When I first rose out of school, we were very cautious of straying too much from the expectations of the system. We tried to make our curriculum plan compatible with what we thought was acceptable. We wrote down every textbook I had used in school and every chapter I would read and every activity I would do and every unit I'd explore. But as we redefined learning we began to abandon the rigid and familiar structure of school.
I think it really happened one weekend when I opened my Science textbook to the weather unit. I read about five pages and took notes, and then I got to some practice questions. I didn't know the answer. I asked my mother. She didn't know either. It got very messy as my mother started looking frantically on the internet and we both got more and more upset with one another. The frustration grew. The truth was, I didn't want to do the weather unit but the words of our curriculum plan loomed in my brain. I was supposed to. All I wanted my mother to say was "Forget about the weather unit, forget about all the things we wrote, do what you want to do." But I didn't have the courage to tell her this.
Being a teacher, she thought in a teachery way and pursued the question at hand. There were tears from my side and shouting from both sides. My father appeared and became peacemaker and right then and there it was established that I wouldn't do anything I didn't want. I was free to learn what I wanted to learn.
I immediately jumped on to the computer chair and began researching some articles about Ayurvedic medicine, Buddhism, and Hinduism. I had come across these the day before but hadn't read the articles which seemed so interesting because I felt I was supposed to be doing something else. My mother pointed out that I actually was doing what we had written on the sheet because this research applied to ancient India. At this point I realized just how flexible learning could be.
Things I should learn, hmmm. Well, I should know how to walk and talk and read and write and buy groceries and use the bathroom…. I've given up trying to figure out what I should learn. Everyone has different ideas about this, and if I tried to do all these things there would be no room left in my brain. I've discarded the importance of externalizing my goals and looking for approval, instead I use my own inner wisdom to guide me.
All in all, I'm happy, I'm challenged, and I'm learning so I don't see what everyone is so worried about.
"Well, I'm happy for you. But, you should realize, this may be alright for you but most kids couldn't do it."
When people make this comment it is usually based on the idea that children are not disciplined enough to pursue knowledge without the imposing structure of the system. The fact is, most children have been in the system so long that their natural desire for knowledge is often covered up. Children, if left to their own devices will naturally go after knowledge and learn. It is unfortunate that so much of their curiosity is smothered by the idea that certain kinds of knowledge are more important than others.
Adults assume that we need to control our children and direct their minds in order for them to learn anything. Most people think that if children have complete freedom it will be a recipe for chaos and laziness. The truth is, when you are free to pursue the information that is important to you, all learning becomes exciting and you are passionate about learning.
If you were forced to learn in system that doesn't honor your individuality, wouldn't you be a bit resistant? This is why it would be beneficial if children were free to begin with.
It is impossible to stop learning. You just have to broaden your view of what learning is. If children are given the trust and support they need it is inevitable that they will learn.
I am not trying to say that everyone should follow the path I've chosen, my only goal is to present another way, an alternative. We say we give kids choices, and that we live in "a free country" but how is one really making a choice if they see only one available option?
When people say that most kids couldn't do this I say give them a chance. How do you know?
What about the prom/graduation?
What about the prom? If you aren't in school I'm sure you can still go if you get someone to invite you. Most kids don't go to the prom anyway. If the prom is that important to you then you can always find a way to go or even have your own!
Personally, the prom has no significance to me. I can see my friends any time, it isn't much different if they are in fluffy dresses and tuxedos or not.
Graduation, well you could always attend the one at your local high school if you wanted. I also find this to be a rather boring tradition. Have your own celebration! If school is not serving your needs, graduation isn't a factor that will immediately reverse your decision.
Are you still in contact with the school you left?
Yes, I am in contact with most of my teachers there and I pop in from time to time for visits or to drop off textbooks and other materials I borrowed. (They were quite helpful as far as lending materials!) I've gone on field trips but I don't spend a lot of time there.
The extent that you stay in communication with your school is entirely up to you and your school. I've heard of kids taking one or two courses from their high school or helping a teacher out to receive tutoring in return but I haven't explored these options personally.
Do you need a parent who is a teacher or has certain credits to be able to be "approved" by the department of education?
No. No, not at all. My mother happens to be a teacher but it is in no way a requirement. In the first place, she doesn't teach me. Some people who don't go to school have teacher/student relationships with their parents but many do not. The department of education doesn't discriminate against people who wish to learn outside the school system based on their parents' level or type of education.
I have found that everything has become a resource to me. My parents are merely facilitators and I have lots of other resources to draw upon for information. I know a few people who are professors in different areas that I could ask for help, as well as two libraries, the Internet and other adults who have become mentors. Also, I correspond with lots of my former teachers and they have proven to be a wonderful help.
I am my own teacher so it doesn't matter if my parents are qualified or not. I choose the material and how I'll go about learning it. I choose when to take breaks and when to keep going and my mother and father are there as aids if I get stuck.
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If you have any questions that I haven't answered or general comments please feel free to email me at or you can refer to the links I've provided under Freedom.
~Laura